Unfiltered rants from the morning Chiya Pasal to the evening Bhatti.
50 articles
Today, let’s talk about our great educational consultancies. While manpower companies extort a few lakhs from our folks when the actual cost is a meager 10,000 with free visas and tickets, our so-called education wallahs seem to extort far more from students dreaming of going abroad.
Let us also pray we don't read about the infamous Everest rescue scams again. To deal with these scammers who ruin our national reputation, standard jail time isn’t enough. They should be forced to listen to Bon Jovi for 48 hours straight, with their faces plastered on billboards at Everest Base Camp.
The "Jumbo Ministry Club" is finally hitting the treadmill. Balen is slashing the cabinet down to a lean 18. This is a disaster for the professional jholeys (bag-carriers) who usually thrive on feeding off taxpayers’ money like parasites. No more free lunches for the ministers’ personal assistants, their third cousins, or the "contractor-kaji" cadres. In this "new-new" Nepal, if you aren't providing value, you aren't getting a paycheck.
Aama did a decent job holding the country together for the elections, but then the "Old Guard" fever kicked in. On her way out, she suddenly decided that her personal assistant was the most qualified person in Nepal to lead nature conservation. Because, clearly, carrying a briefcase prepares you for saving the snow leopard.
It’s a match made in heaven: one man who loves moving stones and another who’s still stone-cold bitter about his old ministry. We live in hope that they actually find a middle ground, though with Harka’s track record, that "middle ground" probably just involves digging a very deep trench in the middle of nowhere while Kirati shouts into a megaphone about the good old days.
If a boy or a girl from your neighborhood stood first, the entire Anchal threw a party. BRB was the intellectual poster boy of Gorkha, the man with a PhD from JNU—the "communist heaven" of Indian academia. He was the "intellectual communist" who promised a revolution, but ended up as the Robin to Prachanda’s Batman ego.
We traded long lectures on Marxism and Maoism for actual results, and nobody missed the 4-hour speeches. Getting a driver's license in 4 days instead of 4 years—because the old guard thought "patience" was a mandatory driving skill. Doing work without bribes feels so strange that some people are still looking for a hidden camera.
The FNCCI has this peculiar little rule: the Senior Vice-President automatically slides into the President’s chair. It’s like a corporate version of Game of Thrones, but with more suits and less honor. One has to wonder how "fair" this actually is. In a country where every election—from federal polls to the local youth club—is a messy saga of factions, "bhag-banda" deals,
We have hundreds of colleges here in Kathmandu with funny, slightly-incorrect foreign names like ‘Liverpool College’ with a logo that's a little too close to the LFC one. They offer ‘foreign college degrees’ right here on New Baneshwor! But apparently, that’s not enough.
Gone are the days when becoming an Ambassador was a "Buy One, Get One Free" deal for party donors. The RSP has basically put up a "Help Wanted" sign on the door of the Foreign Ministry, and for the first time in history, "knowing a guy who knows a guy" isn't a valid qualification!
For decades, our government offices haven't been run by hakims, but by twelve different unions representing twelve different shades of "Give Me More." Almost 80% of our sarkari karmacharis are card-carrying members of the old-school corrupt parties.
After months of the Chief Justice seat gathering more dust than a government file in a basement, we finally have a name: Manoj Kumar Sharma. Our previous CJ went home after hitting 65, leaving the judiciary in a temporary coma. Now, the Constitutional Council (CC) has stepped up, and predictably, the "Old Guard" is having a collective meltdown.