The Kathmandu District Court has finally decided that running a multi-million rupee international human trafficking ring is worth exactly the same time commitment as a standard undergraduate degree. Main operators like Keshab Dulal, Sanu Bhandari, and Tek Narayan Pandey can now happily look forward to four years of rent-free, state-funded accommodations. It seems the going rate for selling out your own country's sovereignty has suffered from heavy market deflation, giving a whole new meaning to "budget justice." Yet, watching powerful masterminds actually marching into prison cells provides a flickering hope that the law might eventually catch up with everyone.
By Sita Rana
15 Jul 2026
6 min read
The government has finally found the perfect cure for highway accidents by sealing the valley checkpoints until the mountains finish swallowing the roads. Think of it as a mandatory, city-wide staycation where you can bond with Kathmandu's legendary traffic without actually going anywhere. On the bright side, being stuck at a checkpoint guarantees you won’t be buried alive by a rogue hillside today. It truly takes a masterclass in governance to realize that cars shouldn't drive into falling boulders, requiring only a few decades of buried vehicles to figure it out.
By Sita Rana
14 Jul 2026
5 min read
The official price tag of a citizen's life under Singha Durbar has finally been itemized into a neat 9-point checklist. It is a spectacular "package deal" in a country where one must literally set themselves on fire not to change the system, but simply to secure a job for their wife and free schooling for their daughter. Yet, despite the grim prerequisite, the government’s swift intervention shows a rare moment of bureaucratic pulse in comforting a grieving family. This agreement sparks a genuine hope that structural safety nets will eventually replace the need for such fatal, desperate cries for justice.
By Sita Rana
13 Jul 2026
6 min read
In a standard post-tragedy negotiation ritual, the heartbroken parents of 25-year-old Ganesh Nepali have travelled all the way from Mugu to Kathmandu to demand that their late son be declared an official "Shahid" (Martyr). They are firmly refusing to accept his body from the District Administration Office until the state signs off on a cozy bundle of martyrdom, financial relief, jobs, and legal action against the municipal police who drove him to ignite himself.
By Sita Rana
12 Jul 2026
7 min read
Ganesh Nepali, the 25-year-old who decided that setting himself on fire was a more viable career move than navigating the domestic economy, has officially succumbed to his injuries at Veer Hospital. Hospital spokesperson Dr. Prakash Budhathoki promised an official press release soon, presumably to ensure the paperwork is as dead on arrival as our social safety nets.
By Sita Rana
11 Jul 2026
6 min read
Our shiny new RSP-led government has single-handedly axed over 1,500 political appointees, proving that your well-connected uncle’s luck has officially run out. Government spokesperson Sasmit Pokharel proudly announced that merit-based entry is the new cool kid in town, leaving seasoned bootlickers scrambling for actual resumes.
By Sita Rana
10 Jul 2026
5 min read
The government has set a rare precedent of administrative efficiency by appointing Govinda Bahadur Karki as the new Chief Secretary two full days before the post officially becomes vacant. With the incumbent, Suman Raj Aryal, facing mandatory retirement this Friday, the cabinet's swiftness betrays a deep, existential dread that leaving the seat empty for even forty-eight hours might accidentally cause the country's development to freeze entirely.
By Sita Rana
9 Jul 2026
6 min read
After tragically claiming two lives, Chitwan's most notorious wild elephant, Dhurbe, is kindly being gifted a brand-new satellite radio collar by an elite technical team. There is immense hope that this expensive gadget will help us track his coordinates in real-time, right up until he decides to smash it against a tree.
By Sita Rana
8 Jul 2026
5 min read
Armed Police Force Inspector Kalpana Gurung and her accomplice have been granted seven more days of judicial custody, giving them ample time to brainstorm how Rs 11 crore mysteriously vanished from a school fund. It is deeply inspiring to see our law enforcement officers taking such an active, hands-on interest in high-level financial asset redistribution within educational institutions.
By Sita Rana
7 Jul 2026
6 min read
In a stunning plot twist that absolutely no oxygen-producing tree saw coming, the Nepali Congress has decided that its 15th General Convention will go entirely "paperless" by prioritizing EVMs and digital tech. We can only pray that their internet servers are significantly more stable than our rotating door of ruling political coalitions.
By Sita Rana
6 Jul 2026
6 min read
Prime Minister Balendra "Balen" Shah's government just completed its first 100 days, proving that running a country is exactly like writing a rap verse—mostly setup, with a lot of people waiting for the drop. Spokesperson Sasmit Pokharel hosted a grand press conference at Singha Durbar to parade their achievements, assuring us that a multi-point checklist was definitely checked, or at least looked at very intensely.
By Sita Rana
5 Jul 2026
6 min read
The Supreme Court fixed a chaotic legal loophole by ruling that government employee seniority for promotions must be calculated from the exact date of their initial appointment, not the day they actually bothered to show up and punch the clock at the office. This landmark decision from a full bench was required because different court departments kept contradicting each other, much like a group of toddlers arguing over a toy.
By Sita Rana
4 Jul 2026
6 min read